*deep breath* here we go..

*Disclaimer: all past, present, and future views expressed throughout Jay’s Epic Misadventures are solely my own, and do not represent the opinions of any particular entity or affiliation I associate with. Short story shorter, don’t try to link what I say/think as a negative to where I work/who I associate with.*

I thought we made our point.

I thought we had shed enough blood, whether it be via incidence, or response to said incidence. Welp, a little over 60 days after we watched on the edge of our seats as our nation came to yet another boiling point with George Floyd/Ahmaud Arbery/Breonna Taylor/(insert Black person unnecessarily being shot), we witness yet another example of police brutality that we have had to absorb and unpack. The fact that this is occurring in such an alarming rate (even though it’s more pronounced as cell phone cameras are the difference between hearsay and proof of what has been called out for years) gives me pause for the future.

2020 has been difficult, to put it lightly. It’s to the point where I am starting to even look past stores putting out Christmas decorations entirely too early. Normally, I would have my “get off my lawn” moment, talking how we barely have stuff out for Halloween, yet we have trees, signs and decorative figures out for purchase 117 days before Christmas. At this point, I’m surprised they haven’t started putting out New Year’s champagne flutes and party hats the way this year needs to be over. This go around, I’ll let it slide and buy my 13 foot decorated tree and Costco decorations this week.

This was a post I was going to write fresh off news that Chadwick Boseman passed. Honestly, it was a rough week altogether, and I needed to rest instead of trying to get this out. I feel that me writing this 24 hours prior would have been incomprehensible and full of ranting. I still have several thoughts and am trying to piece them together. I believe I can write this from a better perspective than before.

So, we all know now that he had been fighting colon cancer for the last few years, and that he gave us multiple performances during that time. Obviously, the one that many of us know him for is playing King T’Challa (that Black Panther fella). I’m not the Lorax, and I don’t speak for the trees, but I can imagine he grew weary of going everywhere and only being greeted by others by crossing their arms and breaking it.. but everyone did it. I say this to give respect to his other roles he portrayed (Jackie Robinson in “42”, James Brown in “Get On Up”, to name a couple), and to appreciate the body of work he was able to produce, especially in the last few years. To my point, although he might have been wanting to be known as more than just the Black Panther and what it entails, he still responded to fans and peers alike with the crossed arms and saying what we all say now with a slight tremble in our throats:

Wakanda Forever.

There’s a reason that this stings more than just mourning the person who played the part. Look at the vast majority of superhero movies that have been filmed in recent history:

Yes, I know that’s all Marvel, I couldn’t find a picture of a DC compilation poster. Nevertheless, there’s a slight discrepancy in the number of characters with melanin. Might be making a blanket statement here, but I’m sure when we were growing up, everyone wanted to see a superhero that looked like them.. that they could aspire to be like, that they could emulate their action scenes and be proud of what they stood for. I’m not saying there weren’t Black superheroes before, but for every Spawn and Blade (more anti-heroes than superheroes), there was Blank-Man and The Meteor Man. Obviously the latter two were more satirical and comedic relief during the 90’s, willing to bet the farm and dog that kids weren’t looking to especially dress up as Meteor-Man for Halloween. Unless you did, which I might lowkey want proof of.

The point is, a Black lead superhero was something missing.. no offense to Luke Cage and Black Lightning, they have been pivotal on the small screen and Netflix.. but back in my day, there were these things called movie theaters that we would go to and eat ungodly amounts of unhealthy food for 2-3 hours while we were entertained by those moving pictures. Hard-pressed to find a movie pre-2018 that fit that bill.

Enter Black Panther.

It was the type of movie you would see multiple times in theaters (as is the case with most Marvel movies) for the nuances. It stayed true to its African roots, and was unapologetic about it. The character itself embodied the qualities that Black men (and women as well, not leaving you out either, there were STRONG women in this film) want to see in themselves: strength, courage, leadership, wit.. all without a seedy past or an anti-hero type vibe. Children of all races and ethnicities put on the toy masks, the claw necklace, and they immerse themselves in their imagination as being that character. Chadwick made us all believe that we were/are part of Wakanda, and what the world needs to imitate to get back on its axis. The simple arm-crossing gesture was a worldwide symbol of power and inner strength. I’ve only done it a few thousand times.

When he passed, it felt like we lost that. As invested as we all had been, kids that looked up to the character no longer have the person who played it so well. I’ve heard both sides about retiring the character versus re-casting it for future possibilities. All I can say is that if Marvel does move forward with bringing a different actor to reprise the role, that person has some shoes to fill.

To Chadwick: Thank you for being such a fighter and entertainer, even when no one knew of your illness. You were a class act, and I know you and Stan Lee will reunite in the skies and look down on us as we remember you. This is why you give people their flowers while they are alive. Rest in glory, rest in honor, and rest in power.

Moving forward… I wish I could say that I was going onto a more positive topic. It’s a very touchy subject, but one that I can’t stand on the sidelines or stay silent for.

Jacob Blake. His name is Jacob Blake. Just like her name was/is Breonna Taylor. I didn’t speak on this topic for days, even though I saw the video just like everyone else. With every video you see of a person of color being gunned down, it felt more (and I am shaking my head as I write this) status quo with what has been going on over the last few months. It’s terrible to feel that way, and I hate that I do/did. Of course, there is internal and external outrage that has to be compartmentalized, and there needs to be action and consequences for these atrocious acts. Like any shooting you see at near point-blank range, it was difficult to watch. At the onset of hearing about it, there was a sense of dejection in the sense that after you work so hard to create this counterculture for police brutality and treatment of people of color, this news sets you back to square one.. like the work was for naught. It obviously isn’t, but fxck, you can’t help but get tired of this shit. It legitimately makes you wonder about what motives people actually have for the advancement (or lack thereof) for society.

I’m glad athletes and social figures are using their respective platforms to make their voices heard. I’m glad they don’t “ShUt Up AnD dRiBbLe” or “StIcK tO SpOrTs”. We’re quick to honor Muhammad Ali for his actions and his political decisions he made (and point out the consequences for said decisions and the sacrifices he made because of it), but God forbid athletes today use their platform to make a statement. The hypocrisy is astounding.

If you didn’t know this about me, I unapologetically (and continually) state), #BlackLivesMatter. It will not go away; I will not go away. I’ve driven through towns with banners, bumper stickers and other paraphernalia proudly stating “Back The Blue/Blue Lives Matter/(insert counter-protest saying here)”. I’m going to be Swarovski crystal clear with my next words, as I am aware that the internet remembers anything and everything published.

I know friends and family members that are either currently on the police force or have served as officers of the law. I know them in particular to be good, kind people. But I will separate the person from the occupation. They are good people that happen to be officers of the law. There are no “good officers of the law”. There is not a “bad apple” mentality. That only supports complicity in these acts we constantly have replaying in the back of our heads, only differing in replaying the situations with us with that chalk outline instead of those mentioned. In response to the Blue Lives Matter movement that is counterproductive to what the original BLM movement is fighting for, let us be clear:

You chose to be Blue. I did not choose to be Black.

“Oh, well, Jay, why are you bringing up the race card?” Because it’s the card I’m told not to play while I see a frightening trend in seeing our pleas for justice and equality fall by the wayside. I am proud to be a young Black male on this Earth, I would not have it any other way. I appreciate those fighting for the cause whether they match my skin tone or not. But to have a choice in your life path to graduate from the academy, and then protest the fact that my life (which could be ended by a slip of a trigger happy finger or a mistaken identity, or for no valid reason at all) doesn’t have enough merit to warrant that it matters.. so much so that you need to insert your own agenda? It’s literally the house on fire example (which mainly refers to the All Lives Matter counterprotest, but can be applied here as well):

.. every house is great in its own accord, but complaining about the fire that might happen or complaining when there is a four-alarm fire next door that is getting put out and your house is not getting that same attention does not make sense. Especially when you control the matches.. and the water.

I said what I said. I stand by what I said. I will gladly entertain civil conversation. We can agree to disagree, you can unfollow or block my posts. In the end, the message does not change until the rhetoric and the societal norms change.

Saying it louder for those in the back who skipped to the end: #BlackLivesMatter.

Thank you, and good night.